Almost Elmer season
by penguinsskrp
Summary: Just a one-shot with Bugs and Daffy. After hunting season starts up again the two run into Elmer and well i'm sure you know the rest. R&r please! Thank you! Enjoy!


**A/N Just another one-shot about Bugs and Daffy, this one's kind of different and it has no relation to my other Bugs and Daffy ff. But I hope you enjoy R&R please, thank you! Oh and Stripstripes if you're reading this I'm currently working on another Bugs and Daf ff for you! :) **

LTLTLTLT

Bugs was relaxing in his overly large comfy chair. The cool breeze slowly working its way through the burrow was enough to put the rabbit to sleep. But all hopes of that _ever_ happening quickly went out the window and far, far down the street. A gun. With its shinny silver nose pointing directly down his rabbit's hole. Bugs sighed, he'd guessed it was getting close to that time, (he'd even checked his watch ) but the time must have escaped him. So without even twitching an ear Bugs waited for the famous lines.

"Ah-ha! I've got you now, you wascally wabbit!" And there they were. "Come on up here you mangy wabbit, or I'll shoot!" Bugs sighed internally; this was becoming a habit of theirs lately or rather yearly. He got up, slowly taking his time as he walked towards the nose of the gun. Feigning a stretch, Bug's left arm went up and forcefully pushed against the gun. There was a sudden noise of impact and then –

"Ouch! Why you- you just wait until I get my hands on you wabbit! If it's the last thing I do!" Bugs put a hand to his mouth trying to suppress his chuckle. Then he shook his head as he started to climb out.

Elmer was clutching his nose with one hand and the other with his gun. His eye glaring daggers at the rabbit. Bugs instinctively pulled out a carrot and slid it into the corner of his mouth.

"Ehh, what's up doc?" Elmer suddenly blinked then grabbed his gun with both hands.

"Now don't you move." He said taking aim. Bugs rolled his eyes, so this was how it was going to be. He stuck his finger into the barrel of the gun, plugging it. Unfortunately Elmer didn't notice.

'BANNGGG!' And as the smoke started to clear, there stood Elmer. His body covered in soot, his clothes tattered and ripped. Bugs grinned at the look of utter confusion on his face.

"Ehh, sorry doc, but I'm not really in da mood for huntin' today." He said climbing the rest of the way out and standing. Elmer shook himself, his previous state suddenly disappearing.

"Oh, yeah? Well who asked you, wabbit?" He said picking up his gun once more and taking aim. Bugs sighed, here they go.

"Look doc, are you sure you want ta do this?" Bugs said frowning.

"Of course I'm sure, it's wabbit season and I'm gonna hunt me some wabbits!" Elmer suddenly shoved the gun into Bugs's chest, forcing him to stumble backwards. Bugs had a sudden idea.

"No it aint." Elmer looked confused.

"What do you mean it aint?"

"It's Duck season." Bugs said pointing to a sign that was nailed to a tree. Elmer seemed shocked. Then he smiled sheepishly at Bugs.

"Oh uh, pardon me, uh wabbit. I had no idea." He said taking his hat off and looking everywhere but at Bugs. Bugs grinned as Elmer started to back away from him, a look of embarrassment still red on his face.

"What a maroon." Bugs chuckled.

LTLTLTLT

"Freeze duck! Or I'll shoot!"

Daffy immediately froze, until he recognized the voice. Elmer. Sighing Daffy turned around, knowing full well what was about to take place.

"I said freeze!"

"Why it ithsn't duck thseason." Daffy said pointing to a nearby sign that read rabbit season. Elmer stared. What was going on? He franticly looked between Daffy and the sign. Who should he believe?

LTLTLTLT

The sound of a nearby gunshot went off and Bugs flinched slightly at the noise. Suddenly stopping for a moment of silence. Some poor soul just lost their –

"You!" Bugs looked up. _Daffy?_ The duck was storming towards him. His beak however was facing the wrong way, _again._ Bugs tried to hide his smirk.

"Daffy?"

"Don't you Daffy me, mithster, I know what you did!" Bugs frowned.

"What did I do Daf?" Daffy began to fume at these words.

"You told that hunter that it was duck thseason!"

"Oh did I?" Bugs said grinning, he was enjoying this. He loved to mess with the duck. Daffy threw up his hands.

"Yes! You did, and now you're going to tell him that it really is rabbit thseason!"

"Eh, no can do duck." Daffy began to growl.

"And why not." Bugs shrugged.

"Better you than me doc." Daffy planted a hand on his face and slowly dragged it down in frustration.

"Oh boy." He sighed.

Suddenly Elmer appeared, firing shots in every direction. Both Bugs and Daffy jumped at the noise.

"Look either you tell him or I will!" Daffy shouted, Bugs shrugged again.

"Your funeral." Daffy shook his head and turned away from him, facing Elmer and his round of bullets.

"Wait! Thstop! HOLD IT!" Elmer stopped dead in front of Daffy and Bugs.

"Look pal, it isn't duck thseason it's rabbit thseason, thsee." He pointed to another sign, unfortunately it read duck season. Elmer frowned.

"No wait, that can't be, it'ths rabbit thseason, it –" Daffy's eyes flew to Bugs. But really that was all the time Elmer needed.

'BAANNG!'

" . . . . . ."

"You're detthhspicable." Bugs coved his mouth and turned away, laughing. Daffy's beak was floating a few feet away in the air. Coming to land at Bug's feet. Elmer on the other hand was looking fiercely between them and to something behind them. They both turned around. There behind them were tons of nailed signs. Duck and rabbit season, was written everywhere. They turned back to see Elmer deep in thought.

"Uh, doc?"

"Thhssshhh!" Daffy hissed. "Now's are chance to escape!" Bugs nodded and they started to tip toe away.

They only made it about three feet before Elmer's head shot up.

"Hold it wight there you two." So close.

". . . . ."

" . . . . ."

'BAANNGG!' Both Daffy and Bugs started running at full speed.

LTLTLTLT

They had been running for quite some time now, but every time they stopped to rest, Elmer seemed to find them and the whole thing would start over again. It wasn't like they hadn't already been shot. Daffy's beak had come of more than once during their mile long sprint. And Bugs was covered head to tail in soot, a few patches of fur missing here and there. Daffy pressed his back up against the coolness of a tree, Bugs beside him as they tried to catch their breath.

"Bugths." He started to gasp. "I . . . don't know . . . how much more. . . I can . . . take." Bugs nodded.

"Me neither duck."

They stiffened as gunshots rang out.

"But we've got ta get out of here, I tink ol' Elmer's lost it!" Daffy nodded.

"Yeah, but how are we going to do that?" Bugs suddenly frowned in thought.

Elmer was getting closer, his shots getting louder. Daffy closed his eyes in fear, any moment now he would find them. Daffy could already feel his beak being shot off. Instantly he grabbed it, hoping to hold on to it this time. Bugs was clearly still thinking about their escape when a bullet flew over their heads. Daffy cringed.

"I've got you now wabbit! Duck!" Elmer yelled raising his gun so that he would get a good enough shot. Daffy quickly ducked, wrapping his hands over his head for cover. He briefly looked up in time to see that Bugs hadn't moved, he almost looked lost. Fear coursed through him and he yanked at Bugs's legs, pulling him downward with force. Bugs seemed shocked as his body started to fall towards the ground, just as another shot rang out.

Bugs sat there on his hands and knees, his back pressed up against the tree. Daffy was next to him, his beak shaking slightly. Without wasting another second Bugs jumped up, grabbing Daffy by his wing and hauling him away as they tried to find a better place to hide. Daffy suddenly took the lead, pulling them towards a giant empty log nearby. They quickly crawled inside and stayed silent as they listened to Elmer shoot at nothing but thin air. After a few seconds Bugs decided it was safe to speak.

"Uh, thanks for that, doc." He said awkwardly. Daffy looked over at him.

"For what? Oh you mean for thsaving your life?" He said smugly, Bugs frowned but nodded.

"Yeah dat."

"Thso did you come up with a plan yet?"

"No." Daffy frowned.

"No? Then what the heck were you thstanding around for?"

"I dunno doc!" Bugs suddenly yelled. Daffy looked taken aback.

"Thsheethsh you don't have to yell." Bugs sighed, but abruptly stiffened.

"What is it –"

"Sshh!"

". . . ."

"I hear something." Bugs whispered and Daffy stiffened as well. Suddenly the light at one end of the log went out, they both turned and stared. Daffy began to shake again. But while their eyes where focused on the dark end of the log, Bugs felt something cold and hard press against his back. He gulped, loudly. Daffy's shaking stopped when Bugs forcefully grabbed his beak, pulling it off with ease. Spinning around quickly Bugs shoved Daffy's beak up the nose of the barrel.

"Hold your breath Daf!" Bugs yelled. Daffy held his breath just as Elmer pulled the trigger.

'BOOOM!'

They made there get away as a smoke covered Elmer tried to stop coughing. Daffy's beak was still in the gun and Daffy wanted to turn around and grab it, but Bugs had a firm grip on his arm and pulled him back.

"Leave it Daf!"

He wanted to yell 'I can't!' but sadly his mouth was filled with soot and bullets.

"Oooh! You wascally wabbit! I'm gonna blow you to pieces!" Elmer shouted, grabbing at Daffy's beak and tossing it aside. Elmer was done playing games. He knelt on the ground and aimed the gun, pulled the trigger and fired.

Everything started to slow down for Daffy. He heard the gun, saw Bugs flinch and then he felt really heavy. Like an extra weight had been placed on him. It wasn't until they smacked the ground did Daffy realize that Bugs most have been hit. But he didn't get up, he just laid there to afraid to move. He suddenly understood why he felt so heavy, with Bugs's body pressed on top of him. He didn't dare move.

Somewhere in the distance Daffy heard a cheerfully cry and hopped that it would stay away. He looked closer at Bugs. The rabbit didn't look dead, in fact he looked asleep. But Daffy knew better than to try and fool himself. Slowly and gently he pushed Bugs off of him, he couldn't stay here, not if he wanted to live. Sluggishly he started to get up, but something grabbed him. Daffy's eyes shot downwards and landed on Bugs. The rabbit's eyes opened barely.

" What are ya doin? Get back down here and act dead." He hissed. Daffy blinked.

"Bugths? You – you're not dead!"

"Of course I'm not dead, Elmer cant' aim if his life depended on it." Bugs winked. Daffy felt relieved, but did as he was told and laid back down.

After Elmer finished his little 'Hooray' dance he went to collect his kill. Unfortunately what poor Elmer wasn't expecting was for neither of his kill to actually be dead. So when he reached out to pick up the 'dead' rabbit, Elmer felt a pain in his hand. The rabbit had actually _bit_ him! Bugs tore himself away from Elmer's grip and quickly took off running. When Elmer looked back down for the duck, he was gone. Elmer began to shake with fury! They had escaped! They weren't dead! He started to bang his hands against his head he was so frustrated.

Bugs and Daffy couldn't help but laugh as they watched Elmer throw a fit. They were behind another tree, but a safe distance away. Daffy had his beak again, after Bugs had provided a long enough distraction.

"Curse you wabbit!" Elmer cried out.

"Why does he always curse you?" Daffy asked Bugs. Bugs shrugged, starting to walk away. It was clear Elmer was done for the day. He had thrown a fit, now it was time for his nap. Besides a nap didn't sound like a bad idea Bugs thought. There was no doubt Elmer would be back tomorrow, just as vengeful as ever, and he was going to need his rest.

"Eh, you want him to curse you, doc?" Bugs said glancing behind him. Daffy folded his arms.

"No, but it does thseem rather rehearsed doesn't it?" Again Bugs shrugged.

"Thso how'd you come up with that plan?"

"I didn't, I got scared, and instinct took over." Daffy stared at him.

"You know you're a rabbit right, not a opothssum." Bugs chuckled. Daffy suddenly ran head long into a sign, his beak falling off in the process.

"What the-" He glared at Bugs "Duck thseason." He said pointing up at the sign. Bugs smirked.

"You truly are dethspicable." Bugs laughed and gently kicked his beak to the side.

"Hey!" Daffy yelled chasing after it. Bugs began to laugh harder.

"Aint I stinker?"


End file.
